Chris Brockman’s 100% Completely Unbiased Patriots’ ‘26 Record Prediction Is…?

Chris Brockman had a plan, and the plan was to reach Week 1 without ever playing the win-loss game.

"I was hoping to just kind of fly under the radar," he admitted.

"That was never a possibility," Rich said, and put the Patriots schedule on the screen.

The setup was the Kayshon Boutte trade, and whether it should worry New England that the roster viewed him as expendable. Chris made the case that it should not. Mike Vrabel himself said the team is not deep, but the receiver room was the exception, and Boutte asked out. With AJ Brown and Romeo Doubs added, he was the odd man out. Turning that into secondary depth reads as a win for both sides.

On Christian Gonzalez, Chris is unbothered. Gonzalez practiced fully, both sides are working, and the insider read is a coin flip on getting it done before Week 1. Unlike Baker Mayfield in Tampa, there is no hard deadline here. If Week 1 comes and goes, they keep negotiating.

Then came the schedule, and a rare display of restraint that lasted about four seconds.

Chris took the Patriots on opening night in Seattle, and built himself an alibi first, remembering a banner raising in Foxboro where Kansas City came to town and waxed them. A team celebrating can get punched in the mouth. Win.

"Way to set it up," Rich said. "I thought you were hypothetically speaking."

From there: the Steelers at home, win, because it is the Steelers. Jacksonville, win, though he hedged that everything he reads about the Jaguars suggests last season was not a one-off. Buffalo on the road was the first loss, and the initial justification, new stadium vibes, did not survive contact.

He took the revenge game he called the weirdest of the 2025 season. He took the Jets twice. He gave away the Bears on a short week, mostly on the grounds that he has been thinking about attending before they become the Indiana Bears. Miami on the road, where weird things happen, he took anyway. Green Bay at home he took after briefly wondering aloud what anyone thinks about the Packers this year.

Munich against the Lions was the second loss, filed under weird game, weird things happen. That put him at 7-3 at the bye.

Coming out of it, he ran the table with one exception, dropping the Monday nighter in Kansas City. Bills at home, win. Vikings on a Thursday, win. Broncos at home, win, delivered with enough confidence that Rich flagged it. Dolphins at home to close, win.

Final: 13-4.

"So, just like last year, huh?" Rich said.

Chris defended it on the merits. A better roster on paper, another year in the Josh McDaniels system, Vrabel coming off coach of the year, and Drake Maye. Which is a real argument, and also exactly what a man in denial would say.

Rich briefly workshopped the chyron. Brockman in denial.

Chris's rebuttal was one line, and it was the strongest thing he said all segment. They literally won 13 games last year.